The silence between the notes

Last month, I attended a virtual meeting with a nonprofit organization called Stand for Children and I asked if they knew how to help with some of the technological needs that I have observed in my recent classroom observations. Last weekend, I received an email from them inviting me to share my testimony at the upcoming House Education Committee meeting . Sadly, the bill on Digital Equity on was then removed from the agenda. Surprisingly, the bill then was moved back onto the agenda early this morning! Between my regularly scheduled work meetings, I logged on and listened to other speakers who were sharing their testimonies in support of or opposition to the bill. Although there was no more time allowed for new speakers, there was still time to submit my written testimony before the meeting ended. So with fueled by a sudden rush of adrenaline and coffee, I typed up my testimony as quickly as my shaky hands could handle. I don’t think I have ever been so grateful to have the speedy sk...

  I'm an incredibly private person when it comes to my inner questions and fears and ideals. I've only ever shared those with a short list of individual confidants. Although I doubt that most people in my world really realize that there's so much they don't know about me...because I'm also an unusually philosophical and reflective person, and I DO SHARE those reflections sincerely and authentically with my friends/coworkers/etc. when I feel it's important to our purpose or our working relationship. But it's also likely that there are more sensitive, even controversial topics hidden deep below the surface of what I'm comfortable sharing...Until someone manages to open the floodgates and establish themselves as trustworthy enough to handle the rest...then since all of my ideas somehow relate to one another, I can't seem to stop until I explain all of them at once to the poor unsuspecting soul who offered to listen for the first few minutes. ...

Finally! Six days into “vacation”, and I finally accomplished a “morning off!” I  slept in, stayed in my pjs, and curled up with my coffee, kitty, puppy, and book just because I wanted to! In fact I just noticed that it’s almost 1PM and wondered if I should feel bad that I wasted my morning... On the other hand, my sisters would be proud that I'm finally sitting down with a book! They often made fun of me as being the English teacher who doesn't read. In my 13 years as an English teacher, I read PLENTY though! It's just that instead of the publications most of you were reading, I usually read journals, essays, and graphic organizers from 17 year olds. I don’t turn off my work mode easily; I usually keep working or at least thinking about work for days after the calendar says I’m off work. Truth be told, I still sent a handful of emails this morning before I started my book, because I knew those work-related conversations needed to move forward before next week. But I se...

Here I am again, after months of writing things and not posting them. I have in fact had a lot on my mind. (Those of you who know me personally are not at all shocked, I'm sure, but maybe someone out there doesn't yet realize that, so I felt it was fair to say.) But my whole life, I've done this thing where I have too much to say so I say nothing for a while while it bubbles up inside...then I try saying something and it all comes whipping out like a hurricane of nonsense...so then I go back to bottling it up and stating my need for "processing time." Guess that's what's been happening with my sporadic posting for the last few years too. Who would have guessed? Then there's this other thing I do when I don't know what to say--I obsess over a song, poem, essay, etc. in which someone else said what I couldn't. So to that end, I'm directing you to a few two articles by a cause that I admire very much: To Write Love on Her Arms. If you haven...

I recently realized that it has been almost 4 months since I posted anything to this blog and to be honest, I was pretty disappointed in that. But  while deleting outdated memos from my cell phone, I discovered about a dozen pieces that I had typed but never posted. Apparently, I never made the time to revise them to the point where I felt comfortable sharing them. So in a last ditch effort to delay the still imminent return from winter break, I decided to revise and share a few of them today.  Although the next five posts all say they were were written today (and with an impressive 35 minutes between them), they were all written in the fall of last year (and over the less impressive span of a few months).

A different poem started creeping up in me a few days ago but it can't seem to get out yet. I was lying in bed just now, thinking about it, when my mind started thinking about my somewhat unpredictable writing process. This new metacognitive poem was the result of that tangent. At 3AM. My brain has a mind of its own. This is what it had to say.  ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sometimes they just flow out of me, like they've been ready all along.  Other times they wander and rush through my head for days, Like they're trying to find each other  In the chaos of emotions  They've beat down, befriended, or become along the way.