The silence between the notes

In my 15+ years as a teacher, I've never seen such fear for physical and emotional security as what I've seen this year ...and I’ve struggled to find the words to talk about it but I think it’s important that I try to share. In addition to the social-emotional support that teachers offer in an average year, I’ve had to council my high school and university students after 3 separate shootings that have forever changed the way they’ll view their world ; In the last month, I’ve also tried to support them through 2 threats that they suspected were aimed at our own high school. The last 1 was the day my dance team left for the State Championships and it was a frightening whirlwind of emotions for everyone. My main solace was getting on a bus with my students and driving away from the situation, but my students and I continued to worry about our school for the rest of the day. Although I’m glad my students all know that our dance class is a safe place, and that they get the cha...

WARNING: A moment of transparency, and a rather long post ahead.  Yesterday, I had my 3rd teaching evaluation of the year and the administrator asked my students a variety of questions, one of which was "Does your teacher demonstrate enthusiasm in her job?" One dancer laughed and said, "She has more energy than the rest of us every morning." Since this was a student I've known years, I later confessed that I'm usually faking my 6AM energy, but that by pretending I'm excited in beginning of each day, I usually make the energy become a reality. (With the help of my 9AM dose of caffeine and B vitamins, at least until it wears off.) She was surprised that she didn't know how I'd really felt all this time.  And I realized several of my mostly-on-line friends have mentioned similar ideas recently, with kind words about how fun or funny or happy my life seems to be.  (Although those who know me best can attest to what you're about to learn......

I haven't written anything here in a long time. Well, I haven't *finalized* anything here in a long time anyway.  I have plenty of half-drafts tucked away behind the scenes. But I haven't had enough time to fully explain and revise anything lately...And honestly, it seems like I haven't had enough time to accomplish anything in life up to my standards lately, so writing something here certainly wasn't a priority.  But today, I heard a message that was so short and simple that I knew I had time to reiterate it. And more importantly, I knew I *needed* to share it. If any of you are wrestling with these same struggles lately, I hope this 5 minute post will uplift and redirect you (as it hopefully will do for me too)!  *********************************** Many of us have figured out how to live successfully behind the facade of "I'm all good, I've got it all figured out." But this is a terribly stressful way to live, and it still does...

Sometimes sleep isn't just a euphemism.  To sleep, perchance to dream? For in that sleep of death,  what dreams may come? Not the death of a body,  just a day that needs to die.  It used to be a sweet escape,  a peaceful place to hide.  But when daylight nightmares invade your dreams,  where can you escape? I used to dream in nightmares;  Now I dream in days.  If only I could wake  and cease to be afraid...

Have you ever been so desperate to reach your destination that you cut through neighborhoods are back alleys just so that you don't have to stop and "wait for the traffic"? Of course, I'd never make a mistake like that, but I hear that other people do it all the time…  I've begun to realize that our society is making the same type of mistake with our communication.  In this world of endless technology, it would seem that we're surrounded by communication all the time.  However,  I'm afraid that our  important words are rarely written  on paper or spoken into the air for an audience who actually wants to think about them, but rather they're displayed on cell phone screens and computer monitors for audiences who can turn them off and on as the mood fits. And it's making us take our words for granted.  The social media platforms where we display our words for the world convince us that we don't need to communicate personally with anyone because we...

Education reform is not a current trend. It is a never-ending cycle. Once one type of reform takes hold, a new one comes creeping up behind it. So when I ran across this article from 1990-something, I wasn't surprised by what it said. I was, however, surprised by what *I* said. Apparently, I had already begun developing my educational philosophy by the age of 13 or 14. Looking back at it, I kind of feel bad for the teacher who had to read these pretentious middle school musings. Then again, maybe she was reading it and laughing during her spring break--just like I am today.