Sunday, April 20, 2014

Case in point

At 3 AM, a poem came to me and I posted it here with a comment about the unpredictability of writing. In the next 15 minutes, another came to me, but when I went to transfer it from my phone's notebook to this post, I hit a wrong button and lost five lines.

As if to illustrate the point of my 3 AM poem, my 4AM brain decided to forget those five lines entirely. I stayed awake until about 4:15 trying to re-create them, then I finally fell back to sleep. I've worked on it again for about a half-hour now and still can't figure out anything that felt as good as the original. I decided I should post it before I lose anything else! But maybe I'll come back and change it later. It's kind of funny to see that a single poem ended up showing how effortless and laborious the writing process can be.
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I was strong enough to build you up,
To save you from what you might become. 
But when I fell and needed you,
You weren't strong enough to catch me. 

I lamented my shortcomings then 
To fall so far below your arms. 
But then I saw: unable, unwilling,
You had shortcomings of your own. 

I see it now as fair injustice,
To have changed myself, to help change you.
But to lose myself, and you, along the way;
You let me lose so you could win. 

I thought I needed you to save me,
To show I was worth saving too. 
But now I know not to trust in those,
In you, who needed me to lead in the first place.  

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